Again & Again: God Calls Us To Listen
Preached Sunday, February 25, 2024
I have a confession for you this morning: I am a bad listener.
Now, hear me out.
I sincerely and truly hope that, as your pastor, you have all felt listened to and heard by me. If I’m being honest with myself and my pride, I hope you at least think that I am a good listener. And I do believe that I can listen well. And I do believe that I have listened well with many of you. And listening is a skill that I have had to repeatedly practice and work hard at.
My gut-reaction is to interrupt with my own story that your story reminded me of. My innate response is to be thinking of how I will respond while you are talking. And I sometimes still do these things - I’m sure many of you have experienced them.
Thankfully there are always opportunities to work on my listening skills.
In seminary during our field education, we followed a set sharing pattern. One person was to share a story of their time working, no interruptions were allowed. One by one people were to respond in turns, sharing observations or thoughts. If you were the sharer, you were not allowed to respond until everyone else had had a chance. And once you responded, you were not to respond again. Taking turns like this made me realize how much I had to hold back my brain and my mouth from talking. It went against my instincts. And then, in pastoral care class, we had listening partners where we practiced hearing each other’s stories and feelings without interruption. Ask clarifying questions only. And then responding in turn, but keeping the attention focused on them instead of sharing from your own experience.
Giving someone your full attention.
Listening in the moment.
Taking turns to speak and listen.
Asking clarifying questions.
And keeping the conversation focused on the original subject and sharer.
These are signs of good pastoral listening and good listening in general...and they are things I work on constantly. I do strive, every day, to be a good listener. And it doesn’t come naturally to me - it’s something I have worked hard on and continue to work on.
Maybe you are inherently a good listener - good for you! Or maybe you’re like me and can relate to Peter, a chronic bad listener.
In this week’s Scriptures we have an example of Peter not being the best listener.
Jesus was telling him and the others that he would be killed. Peter does not want to hear this. So he pulls Jesus aside and is like, “Jesus! Stop saying things like this!” Jesus, who will have none of it, rebukes Peter, saying “get thee behind me, Satan!” And continues his teaching, not just to Peter, but the whole crowd, about what it means to be his follower - not the message that Peter wants to hear but a message of self-sacrifice, hardship, and impending loss.
If it’s hard to listen in general - it’s harder still to listen to something we don’t want to hear.
I know I struggle with this.
When I first hear a piece of bad news - especially if it interferes with my plans or what I want - I want nothing more than to put my hands over my hearts and go “lalalalalala I don’t want to hear this!”
Basically, this is what Peter did to Jesus.
Jesus: The Son of Man must undergo great suffering.
Peter: lalalalalala, I don’t want to hear this!
Jesus: The Son of Man will be rejected.
Peter: lalalalalala, I don’t want to hear this!
Jesus: The Son of Man will be killed!
Peter: lalalalalala, I don’t want to hear this!
We don’t like to hear things that contradict what we want.
We don’t want to hear that this Spring-like weather in February might not be good for us long-term.
We don’t want to hear that we have to exercise and eat veggies.
We don’t want to hear that we can’t afford that vacation we wanted to go on.
And of course, there are harder, heavier things that we don’t want to hear:
We don’t want to hear that our loved one’s diagnosis isn’t good.
We don’t want to hear that that job opening isn’t going to us.
We don’t want to hear what’s on the other end of the phone when we’re expecting bad news.
We don’t want to hear that we have to change, that things can’t continue like they are.
And then there are the things that go against our bias, our preconceived notions that we don’t want to hear.
Peter thought Jesus was to assume a throne and overthrow the Roman Empire.
He didn’t want to hear that he would suffer and die on a cross.
We don’t want to hear allegations of sexual assault and harassment brought against those we had previously considered good men.
We don’t want to hear the trauma and struggle of our neighbors.
We don’t want to hear that we ourselves are complicit or even benefit from systems that oppress others.
And in our current age, it’s even easier to not hear hard things or not hear things we don’t want to hear because on social media we can literally block, mute, or unfriend people that have differing opinions than us. Or keep them on our friend list and then just continue to shout over each other, not listening and learning from each other, but repeatedly stating how right we are, over and over ad nauseum, never actually listening and learning from each other.
I know that I don’t like to hear critiques or sometimes even constructive feedback. My first reaction is almost always to be defensive. This is something I regularly work on as well. Instead of immediately jumping to being defensive, I have to sit back and discern: is there a hard truth in this that I need to hear? And honestly, sometimes there’s not. But other times, I realize, I do need to hear it. And it’s not easy to hear and I don’t like it and it means I need to listen better and work on myself...but there it is. As Christians, we are called to listen. And we are called to listen to hard things to hear.
We are in good company though. The Bible is filled with stories of people not listening to God: from Adam and Eve in the garden, to Jonah in the belly of the whale, from whole tribes and nations refusing to listen to the headings of prophets, from the disciples and Peter - we are not alone.
6 days after Jesus rebukes Peter for not listening to him, for not hearing the hard things that Jesus was teaching, God speaks in a voice from the heavens: This is my Son, listen to him!
I heard one preacher describe this moment as Jesus’s exasperated parent moment. Just as a parent sometimes throws up their hands and says “Just listen to me!” Jesus was tired of over and over again trying to get the disciples to hear him, to TRULY listen to him and what he was trying to tell them about what it meant to be his follower, that he throws his hands up and enlists the ultimate parent, God, to just say “Listen to him already!”
This is the Good News though.
That although we, like Peter and many others, again and again, time after time, fail to listen to God, God never stops speaking to us and inviting us to listen - again and again.
The Bible is filled with examples of God speaking:
God speaking through prophets.
God speaking through dreams.
God speaking through the still small voice.
God speaking through the burning bush.
God speaking through miracles.
God speaking through angels and messengers.
God speaking through Jesus.
God speaking through the coming of the Holy Spirit.
God speaking through the disciples.
Again and again and again God speaks. Again and again and again, God invites us to listen - even if we didn’t get the message the first time.
And God is still speaking, reaching out and inviting us to listen today - what is God trying to say to us, if we would just listen?
God is speaking to us through the voices of the oppressed and marginalized.
It may be hard to hear - but we need to listen.
God is speaking to us through all of creation, crying out for us to repent of our earth damaging ways.
It may be hard to hear - but we need to listen.
God is speaking to us in the silence of our hearts, laying something on us for this season of Lent, something we need to work on.
It may be hard to hear - but we need to listen.
There is one more thing that sometimes is hard to hear but God is always, always saying to us, always inviting us to listen to, again and again:
And that is, you are my child and I love you.
So today, may we be less like Peter the bad listener...and more like those who have worked hard at listening. May we hear with clarity God’s voice, telling us the things we need to hear, telling us what it means and looks like to be a follower of Jesus.
God is speaking.
May we listen.
Amen.
I sincerely and truly hope that, as your pastor, you have all felt listened to and heard by me. If I’m being honest with myself and my pride, I hope you at least think that I am a good listener. And I do believe that I can listen well. And I do believe that I have listened well with many of you. And listening is a skill that I have had to repeatedly practice and work hard at.
My gut-reaction is to interrupt with my own story that your story reminded me of. My innate response is to be thinking of how I will respond while you are talking. And I sometimes still do these things - I’m sure many of you have experienced them.
Thankfully there are always opportunities to work on my listening skills.
In seminary during our field education, we followed a set sharing pattern. One person was to share a story of their time working, no interruptions were allowed. One by one people were to respond in turns, sharing observations or thoughts. If you were the sharer, you were not allowed to respond until everyone else had had a chance. And once you responded, you were not to respond again. Taking turns like this made me realize how much I had to hold back my brain and my mouth from talking. It went against my instincts. And then, in pastoral care class, we had listening partners where we practiced hearing each other’s stories and feelings without interruption. Ask clarifying questions only. And then responding in turn, but keeping the attention focused on them instead of sharing from your own experience.
Giving someone your full attention.
Listening in the moment.
Taking turns to speak and listen.
Asking clarifying questions.
And keeping the conversation focused on the original subject and sharer.
These are signs of good pastoral listening and good listening in general...and they are things I work on constantly. I do strive, every day, to be a good listener. And it doesn’t come naturally to me - it’s something I have worked hard on and continue to work on.
Maybe you are inherently a good listener - good for you! Or maybe you’re like me and can relate to Peter, a chronic bad listener.
In this week’s Scriptures we have an example of Peter not being the best listener.
Jesus was telling him and the others that he would be killed. Peter does not want to hear this. So he pulls Jesus aside and is like, “Jesus! Stop saying things like this!” Jesus, who will have none of it, rebukes Peter, saying “get thee behind me, Satan!” And continues his teaching, not just to Peter, but the whole crowd, about what it means to be his follower - not the message that Peter wants to hear but a message of self-sacrifice, hardship, and impending loss.
If it’s hard to listen in general - it’s harder still to listen to something we don’t want to hear.
I know I struggle with this.
When I first hear a piece of bad news - especially if it interferes with my plans or what I want - I want nothing more than to put my hands over my hearts and go “lalalalalala I don’t want to hear this!”
Basically, this is what Peter did to Jesus.
Jesus: The Son of Man must undergo great suffering.
Peter: lalalalalala, I don’t want to hear this!
Jesus: The Son of Man will be rejected.
Peter: lalalalalala, I don’t want to hear this!
Jesus: The Son of Man will be killed!
Peter: lalalalalala, I don’t want to hear this!
We don’t like to hear things that contradict what we want.
We don’t want to hear that this Spring-like weather in February might not be good for us long-term.
We don’t want to hear that we have to exercise and eat veggies.
We don’t want to hear that we can’t afford that vacation we wanted to go on.
And of course, there are harder, heavier things that we don’t want to hear:
We don’t want to hear that our loved one’s diagnosis isn’t good.
We don’t want to hear that that job opening isn’t going to us.
We don’t want to hear what’s on the other end of the phone when we’re expecting bad news.
We don’t want to hear that we have to change, that things can’t continue like they are.
And then there are the things that go against our bias, our preconceived notions that we don’t want to hear.
Peter thought Jesus was to assume a throne and overthrow the Roman Empire.
He didn’t want to hear that he would suffer and die on a cross.
We don’t want to hear allegations of sexual assault and harassment brought against those we had previously considered good men.
We don’t want to hear the trauma and struggle of our neighbors.
We don’t want to hear that we ourselves are complicit or even benefit from systems that oppress others.
And in our current age, it’s even easier to not hear hard things or not hear things we don’t want to hear because on social media we can literally block, mute, or unfriend people that have differing opinions than us. Or keep them on our friend list and then just continue to shout over each other, not listening and learning from each other, but repeatedly stating how right we are, over and over ad nauseum, never actually listening and learning from each other.
I know that I don’t like to hear critiques or sometimes even constructive feedback. My first reaction is almost always to be defensive. This is something I regularly work on as well. Instead of immediately jumping to being defensive, I have to sit back and discern: is there a hard truth in this that I need to hear? And honestly, sometimes there’s not. But other times, I realize, I do need to hear it. And it’s not easy to hear and I don’t like it and it means I need to listen better and work on myself...but there it is. As Christians, we are called to listen. And we are called to listen to hard things to hear.
We are in good company though. The Bible is filled with stories of people not listening to God: from Adam and Eve in the garden, to Jonah in the belly of the whale, from whole tribes and nations refusing to listen to the headings of prophets, from the disciples and Peter - we are not alone.
6 days after Jesus rebukes Peter for not listening to him, for not hearing the hard things that Jesus was teaching, God speaks in a voice from the heavens: This is my Son, listen to him!
I heard one preacher describe this moment as Jesus’s exasperated parent moment. Just as a parent sometimes throws up their hands and says “Just listen to me!” Jesus was tired of over and over again trying to get the disciples to hear him, to TRULY listen to him and what he was trying to tell them about what it meant to be his follower, that he throws his hands up and enlists the ultimate parent, God, to just say “Listen to him already!”
This is the Good News though.
That although we, like Peter and many others, again and again, time after time, fail to listen to God, God never stops speaking to us and inviting us to listen - again and again.
The Bible is filled with examples of God speaking:
God speaking through prophets.
God speaking through dreams.
God speaking through the still small voice.
God speaking through the burning bush.
God speaking through miracles.
God speaking through angels and messengers.
God speaking through Jesus.
God speaking through the coming of the Holy Spirit.
God speaking through the disciples.
Again and again and again God speaks. Again and again and again, God invites us to listen - even if we didn’t get the message the first time.
And God is still speaking, reaching out and inviting us to listen today - what is God trying to say to us, if we would just listen?
God is speaking to us through the voices of the oppressed and marginalized.
It may be hard to hear - but we need to listen.
God is speaking to us through all of creation, crying out for us to repent of our earth damaging ways.
It may be hard to hear - but we need to listen.
God is speaking to us in the silence of our hearts, laying something on us for this season of Lent, something we need to work on.
It may be hard to hear - but we need to listen.
There is one more thing that sometimes is hard to hear but God is always, always saying to us, always inviting us to listen to, again and again:
And that is, you are my child and I love you.
So today, may we be less like Peter the bad listener...and more like those who have worked hard at listening. May we hear with clarity God’s voice, telling us the things we need to hear, telling us what it means and looks like to be a follower of Jesus.
God is speaking.
May we listen.
Amen.
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